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Our Radical Unschooling Life

 

 

In this video interview Joe and I talk about what it is like to be Unschooling parents. We share about Radical Unschooling philosophy and our beliefs surrounding respect, kindness and partnership with our children.

I have also posted a few questions that I received after sharing this video with others. Enjoy and please post any questions below.

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Question:
I totally respect how you are raising your family. Not sure I agree with everything you say but get the concept. Nothing wrong with freedom and kids making their own choices. My only question would be freedom comes with responsibility. And the choices we make now can have a lifetime of impact. Like tattoo’s or piercings, etc. How do you handle that issue? Because we (Adults) learn from experience, how do kids know what choices to make when they are not old enough to have experience?

My answer:
When a child is raised with freedom and respect, they trust their parents and believe what they say. We aren’t the wall between our children and their desires in life. We are their partners and in being so, we have a strong influence in their lives. When we share information, they value our words. Our experience in life as parents, then becomes experience that our children trust and take very seriously. When you have a connected relationship with your children and strive for that being the focus, rather than control, your experience in life is very powerful in your child’s life.

Questioner:
For example: One goes and get a neck tattoo, so now they have experienced a tattoo, but then tries to get a higher paying professional job and can’t because of that neck tattoo.. Would you inform your child not to get a neck tattoo?

My Response:
Of course! Much in the same way you would give a friend that information – through discussion. Ultimately it IS their choice though. The surest way you can guarantee he would get one, is to tell him you forbid it. Controlling another human being really warps things for them. It becomes about a struggle for their autonomy once you turn it into a power struggle. In their natural desire for freedom and respect, they will do things that they normally wouldn’t choose to do, because you forbid it and threatened with punishments. You make it about something other than the tattoo… and THAT is when choices are made that people regret later in life… If my child wanted a tattoo at age 18, I would totally support it. Times are changing and if someone wouldn’t hire my child for a neck tattoo, it isn’t a place they would want to work anyway. This mindset it also assuming my children will work for someone else, which is unlikely. We aren’t raising “worker bees,” here. We are raising free-thinking entrepreneurs.

Questioner:
I agree 100%… My parents were very strict! Very Loving but typical Middle Class Strict Parents… My dad got his first tattoo at 57 years old We have these long deep conversations now about life and freedom. And how most Americans have it all work and the school system is a joke. My kids are homeschooled from a (Box) we are slowly learning to let loose of control and enjoy our daily living. The unschooling has really opened my eyes…. Thanks!

 

Comments

  1. Thank you so much for being so open and honest. I am sharing this with everyone! It is also how we ‘un-school’. Yay!!!!
    We are so so so fortunate to have ‘fallen’ into this lifestyle for our children and ourselves. I am always learning so much from my daughter. What amazing human beings they are when we let them be themselves!

  2. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this, especially the awesome closer “And we’re the Martins” with the kids running around doing their own thing and living joyfully. What an inspiration to those of us starting down this path. Thanks so much for sharing.

  3. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I truly appreciate your efforts
    and I am waiting for your next write ups thank you once again.

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