Carmen: I’m here with Dayna Martin, the community producer for Anarchapulco, as well as an advocate for unschooling and peaceful parenting. You’ve been championing this for over 20 years. I like to say you wrote the book on it, and that’s literally true, isn’t it?
Dayna Martin: Yes, I did! I wrote Radical Unschooling: A Revolution Has Begun in 2009. It’s been an incredible journey since then—like a roller coaster ride, really.
Carmen: Let’s talk about Anarchapulco for a bit. For people who aren’t familiar, how did you get involved with the conference? How did you become the community producer?
Dayna Martin: I’ve been involved with Anarchapulco since its inception five years ago. It all started when Jeff Berwick interviewed me. He told me, “You’re an anarchist,” and I thought about it and realized, “Yes, I am!” I like to think of myself as a natural-born anarchist because it’s such an instinctual and natural way to live. I’ve been raising my kids within this philosophy from the very beginning.
Each year, my involvement with Anarchapulco has grown. This past year, I took on the full-time role of community producer. It’s been a big transition, going from being a mom of four to managing this event, but it’s been an exciting and rewarding challenge.
Carmen: I noticed you were interviewing almost every speaker this year. That’s a big shift since you’re usually the one being interviewed. How was that experience for you?
Dayna Martin: It was definitely a change! I’m so used to being on the other side of the interview, so stepping into this role felt a bit awkward at first. But I learned as I went along, and by the time I finished my last interview, I felt really confident. It was such a great opportunity for me to grow as both an advocate and a person.
Carmen: You did an amazing job. I felt such a welcoming vibe throughout the event. You really helped create a space where people could connect and feel comfortable.
Dayna Martin: Thank you so much! That was really important to me. As someone who’s deeply rooted in the community, I wanted to ensure the event felt inclusive and approachable, especially for newcomers. It’s an honor to serve as a voice for the community and help foster that sense of connection.
Carmen: Speaking of connection, you’re also a leader in the peaceful parenting and unschooling movement. Can you explain your approach to parenting and how it differs from the traditional authoritarian model?
Dayna Martin: Peaceful parenting, or radical unschooling, is a partnership-based approach. It’s about moving away from authoritarian control and building trust and respect with your children. I have four kids—ages 11, 14, 17, and 19—and they’ve never been to school or been punished.
Instead of instilling fear or control, I focus on open communication. I treat my kids with the same respect I’d give a friend or partner. By modeling kindness and understanding, they reflect those qualities back to the world. It’s a deeply rewarding way to parent and live.
Carmen: That sounds incredible. From what I’ve seen at Anarchapulco, there’s such a peaceful dynamic among the families here. It’s inspiring.
Dayna Martin: It truly is. When kids are treated with respect and love, they thrive. They aren’t burdened by the need to rebel or push back against authority. Instead, they feel safe, trusted, and empowered to explore the world in their own way. That’s what unschooling is all about—nurturing their natural curiosity and passions.
Carmen: I can relate to that. I grew up in a more traditional, authoritarian household. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized how much more effective it is to connect with kids on a deeper level, rather than trying to control them.
Dayna Martin: Absolutely. Many of us were raised with authoritarian approaches—punishments, rewards, and fear-based control. But kids are inherently good. They don’t need to be manipulated or forced to obey. What they need is guidance, love, and the freedom to make choices and learn from them.
Carmen: How do you respond to critics who say that unschooling or peaceful parenting is too permissive or unrealistic?
Dayna Martin: I’ve been advocating for this lifestyle for over 20 years, and I’ve heard it all. People assume unschooling means no rules, no structure, and chaos, but that’s not the reality. It’s about freedom balanced with responsibility. When kids have the freedom to make their own choices, they naturally find balance. For example, my kids have the freedom to eat what they want, but they don’t binge on junk food because they’ve learned to listen to their bodies.
The media often sensationalizes what we don’t do—like punish or enforce strict rules—rather than focusing on the positive aspects of what we do. Over time, though, I’ve seen a growing acceptance and understanding of this lifestyle. People are starting to realize how transformative it can be.
Carmen: It’s so inspiring to hear how your kids are thriving. What would you say to parents who are curious about unschooling but don’t know where to start?
Dayna Martin: Start by reawakening your instincts. You already know how to do this—it’s in you. Trust yourself and your child. Shift your focus from controlling behavior to building connection and understanding. Remember that children are inherently good and want to thrive. When you approach parenting with love and partnership, it transforms not just your relationship with your child but your entire way of living.
Carmen: Thank you so much for sharing your insights, Dayna. You’re such an inspiration to so many families.
Dayna Martin: Thank you for having me! If anyone wants to learn more, they can find me on YouTube or join one of my events. I’m always here to help families embrace a more peaceful and connected way of life.